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Hey there,
I need help/input. My good friend is having a bridal shower next Saturday...what should I buy? Am I supposed to buy something? I have never been to one so I feel REALLY
uneasy about going.

I was thinking about buying a really pretty/unique perfume bottle...don't know if she wears perfume or not
but I saw these cute ones that cost a crap load of money...


$126


$375


$275


$155

Help!!! :new_Eyecrazy: I don't think I need to spend that much. We are friends, have been for about 3 years now. We don't hang out all that much, but we keep in touch. This is her first marriage (and hopefully the last!
)

What do I do? She did register with a few companies, but that is for her wedding. I am confused...can you tell?

Help!!!



~Elegant
 

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Does the shower have a theme? When my sister had hers it was a garden theme so everyone got her stuff related to that. I think the perfume bottles are really pretty but I have some I have gotten for gifts and I never know what to do with them, they usually end up sitting on a shelf getting covered with dust so I dont dont know if you want to go spending so much on one.
 

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Ummm...I don't know if it has a theme! Agh!

Can someone tell me what happens at one, the etiquette, etc., the "goings-on" of a bridal shower?
How embarrassing.


~Elegant
 

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I know at my bridal shower everyone gave me stuff we had on our wedding registry.. you could probably do that and maybe buy a little something special like some bath stuff to add with it just to make it personal. I gave my sister-in-law a basket of bath stuff for her bridal shower along with some pillows off her registry and then we got them something more expensive off their registry for their wedding present.
 

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Elegant,
The perfume bottles are beautiful. A question that you have to ask - is this the one and only gift that you will be giving, or will you be asked to other showers, or will you give another wedding gift? It might influence the decision on how much you spend.

I guess that I can give you a different perspective. I've been married nearly 27 years and I can't remember any particular gift that any particular person gave me. I have it written down, of course. I have wonderul friends, but nothing special just sticks in my mind.

Don't kill yourself trying to find the perfect gift.
 

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Discussion Starter #8
She is registered at Macy's and Pottery barn...but she wants wash clothes and really expensive things, like household items and kitchenware. Do I give her two $24 wash clothes at the bridal shower and something else at the wedding? I'm confused, and embarrassed. Will she open the gift at the shower?

~Elegant
 

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Around here, if you buy a gift for the shower, that pretty much counts as your wedding gift too. The bride usually registers for items at several places. Usually for things like china and crystal too. Many times they have several different themed showers (kitchen, garden and tool (both men and women come), Christmas, etc.). If they are members of a church, they usually have a huge church "tea". It can get crazy around the south! If you get invited to more than one it can get expensive.


One silly gift that I got at a shower that I LOVED was a nice square basket from Hall-mark with some imprinted napkins that said "Welcome to Craig and Traci's home"-something like that anyway. They were the little party like napkins, and they fit in that basket. We had enough to last about a year on our coffee table, but as newlyweds, we thought they were neat when company came over. The basket was re-usable and I still use it 10 years later!
It was a cheesy-personal gift, but I loved it. The problem is finding a place that embosses/prints napkins without having to order them. We had a place in town for awhile, and I did it for several friends until the company moved and went out of town.
 

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In Iowa we buy gifts off the gift registry for the shower and wedding. My family has always giving a separate gifts for the shower and wedding. The only way I would spend over $100 on a gift would be if the person was a brother/sister or a very, very close friend. A lot of times friends/family members go in on more expensive gifts.
 

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Originally posted by Elegant@Apr 21 2005, 02:16 AM
She is registered at Macy's and Pottery barn...but she wants wash clothes and really expensive things, like household items and kitchenware.  Do I give her two $24 wash clothes at the bridal shower and something else at the wedding?  I'm confused, and embarrassed.  Will she open the gift at the shower?

~Elegant
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Generally, showers go like this.... You arrive with your gift and it is put in a pile with the other gifts. You then mingle and eat... usually the food is finger foods, punch, cake, etc. Then everyone sits down and the bride-to-be opens her gifts. She opens them and oohs and aahhhs over them and shows each gift to everyone there. Bor----ing!

Regarding what to buy, if the shower does not have a theme (such as a "kitchen shower", etc.) then I would buy something on her registry list. Only for a "Personal Shower" theme would you get something that just the bride can use. Usually, the gift is something for the couple. No, two washcloths would not be a good idea! lol I always think how I'll feel as she shows my gift to everyone... would I be embarrassed? You can get something like a couple of her everyday drinking glasses, cookware, mixing bowls.. etc..... if these items are on her registry.

I have always heard that you buy a gift for the shower and for the wedding. Because you are attending both events and money has been spent to entertain you, etc... so the general rule of thumb is that each guest is invited to no more than one shower and she gets a gift for that and then a wedding gift, also. Usually, the wedding gift is more expensive... such as one or two of the dinner plates in her new China pattern, crystal flutes, etc.

Often the groom will show up as the shower is about over and the bride shows him all the "neat stuff" they got!

IMHO I find showers to be painfully boring but it's hard to get out of going and it's important to support your friend by being there.....
 

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I'm not too good at suggestions...
but those bottles look NEAT! I dont wear much perfume myself... i would just use it as decoration.. hehe..


None of my friends had any showers yet... we havent hit that part in life yet.... haha.. but when we do.. i'm sure i'll be broke from buying presents! haha... I think my friends and I are LATE on the shower thing... marriage... ya kno... haha.
 

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I thought at bridal showers you're suppose to give sexy lingerie!
 

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Lexi's mom! OH MY GOSH! HAHAHAHAH
 

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Originally posted by Kallie/Catcher's Mom@Apr 21 2005, 07:58 AM
I have always heard that you buy a gift for the shower and for the wedding. Because you are attending both events and money has been spent to entertain you, etc... so the general rule of thumb is that each guest is invited to no more than one shower and she gets a gift for that and then a wedding gift, also. Usually, the wedding gift is more expensive... such as one or two of the dinner plates in her new China pattern, crystal flutes, etc.

Often the groom will show up as the shower is about over and the bride shows him all the "neat stuff" they got!

IMHO I find showers to be painfully boring but it's hard to get out of going and it's important to support your friend by being there.....
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We don't usually do both shower and wedding b/c the "wedding" gifts are what are usually given at the church teas. They are very extravagant and the hostesses go way out/overboard. All the gifts are displayed, you don't bring them wrapped.
They set out place settings of all the china etc. and every gift has a little place card with who sent/gave it. Most of the time as church members/friends, you are invited to both the tea and at LEAST one shower. I usually don't see many gifts the night/day of the wedding except for out of town guests etc.

Originally posted by ButterCloudandNoriko@Apr 21 2005, 08:21 AM
I thought at bridal showers you're suppose to give sexy lingerie! 
 
 

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If you have a lingerie shower you would, but-we usually do that at the batchelorette party....or someone throws a "fun party" if anyone knows what that is...
They are a HOOT!
 

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Originally posted by Lexi's Mom+Apr 21 2005, 09:23 AM-->
<!--QuoteBegin-ButterCloudandNoriko
@Apr 21 2005, 08:21 AM
I thought at bridal showers you're suppose to give sexy lingerie! 
 
 

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At my cousin's shower her soon to be sister in law gave her a suitcase. All of the pockets were filled with condoms.

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Personal bridal showers give the lingerie... or the bachelorette party... (
maybe I just know conservative people....wait...there were strippers...
that's not conservative...)
 

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I have always had a lot of fun at bridal showers. LOL....I would look for something off her registry but don't feel like you HAVE to get her things off of it. Some of my favortie and most usefull gifts were ones that people thought outside of the box.

One of my aunts got me tons of christmas decorations. (I got married in August) at first I was like ummm ok...but come December guess what I needed those and didn't have to go spend money that I didn't have at the time to buy them. It was great. And since it was the off season she got me tons and tons of them.

We also got an awesome cooler and they filled it with picnic stuff. So that was fun to go on some romantic picnics with and is even more usefull now that we have kids in sports.

If she has a china pattern picked out don't feel like you have to get her a complete place setting...go for something smaller...like the salt and pepper shakers they are usually more inexspensive but a piece that is essential.

One friend of mine got me several rolls of film, a gift certificate to get it developed at the local one hour place and a gorgeous photo album. We used the film and album for all our pre-wedding, rehearsal and honeymoon photos. It was really nice and something that we never had even thought of.

I am very picky and will only use plastic hangers and my sister got me a 100 plastic hangers since she didn't figure my husband has his clothes on plastic...since guys don't think about those things....she got me something else also but that was a huge joke but I still have most of those hangers. lol

Good luck and just have fun.
 
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