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<span style="font-family:Optima">All hair removal methods have tricked us with their promises of easy,
painless removal - The epilady, scissors, razors, Nair and now...the
wax. My night began as any other normal weekday night. Come home fix
dinner, played with the kids. I then had the thought that would ring
painfully in my mind for the next few hours: Maybe I should pull the
wax out of the medicine cabinet. So I headed to the site of my demise;
the bathroom. It was one of those cold wax kits. No melting a clump of
hot wax, you just rub the strips together in your hand and then they
get warm and you peel them apart press it to your leg (or wherever
else) and hair comes right off. No muss, no fuss. How hard can it be?
I mean I'm no girly, girl but I am mechanically inclined enough that I
can figure it out. *YA THINK!!!*


So I pull one of the thin strips out. Its two strips facing each other
stuck together. Instead of rubbing them together, I get out the hair
dryer and heat it to 1000 degrees. Cold wax my rear end (Oh how this
phrase haunts me!) I lay the strip across my thigh. Hold the skin
around it tight and pull. OK so it wasn't the best feeling, but it
wasn't too bad. I can do this! Hair removal no longer eludes me! I am
She-ra, fighter of all wayward body hair and smooth skin
extraordinaire. With my next wax strip I move north. After checking on
the kids I sneak back into the bathroom, for the ultimate hair fighting
championship. I drop my panties and place one foot on the toilet.

Using the same procedure I apply the was strip across the right side of
bikini line, covering the right half of my girlie bits and stretching down
to the inside of my butt cheek (Yes, it was a long strip) I inhale
deeply and brace myself. RRRRIIIPPP!!!! I'm blind!!! Blinded from
pain!!!!....OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!
Vision returning, I notice that I've only managed to pull off half of
the strip. Another deep breath and RRIIPP. Everything is swirly
and spotted. Do I hear crashing drums??? OK, back to normal. I want to
see my trophy - A wax covered strip with my hairy pelt, that has caused
me so much pain, sticking to it. I want to revel in the glory that is
my triumph over body hair. I hold up the strip!

There's no hair on it. Where is the hair? WHERE IS THE WAX???

Slowly I ease my head down, foot still perched on the toilet. I see the
hair..The hair that should be on the strip. I touch. I am touching wax.

I run my fingers over the most sensitive part of my body, which is
now covered in cold wax and matted hair. Then I make the next BIG
mistake...................remember my foot is still propped up on the
toilet. I know I need to do something. So I put my foot down.
I hear the slamming of the cell door.
Girlfriend? Sealed shut. Butt?? Sealed shut. I penguin walk around the
bathroom trying to figure out what to do and think to myself "Please
don't let me get the urge to poop. My head may pop off"

Hot water!! Hot water melts wax!! I'll run the hottest water I can
stand into the bathtub, get in, immerse the wax covered bits and the
wax should melt and I can gently wipe it off right??? *WRONG!!!!!!!*I
get in the tub - the water is slightly hotter than that used to torture
prisoners of war or sterilize surgical equipment - I sit. Now, the only
thing worse that having your nether businesses glued together is having
them glued together and then glued to the bottom of the tub. In
scalding hot water. Which, by the way, doesn't melt cold wax. So, now
I'm stuck to the bottom of the tub!!

God bless the man that convinced me I should have a phone in the
bathroom!!!!! I call my friend thinking surely she's waxed before and
has some secret of how to get me undone. It's a very good conversation
starter "So, my butt and who-ha are stuck to the bottom of the tub!"
There is a slight pause. She doesn't have a secret trick but does try
to hide the laughter from me. She wants to know exactly where the wax
is located on bottom "Are we talking cheeks or hole or what?" She's
laughing out loud by now...I can hear her. I give her the rundown and
she suggests I call the number on the side of the box. YEAH!!!!!
Right!! I should be the joke of someone else's night.

While we go through various solutions. I resort to scraping the wax off
with a razor. Nothing feels better then to have your girlie goodies
covered in hot wax, glued shut, stuck to the tub in super hot water and
then dry shaving the sticky wax off!! By now the brain is not working,
dignity has taken a major hike and I slip into glazed donut land. My
friend is still talking with me and my hand reaches towards the saving
grace....the lotion they give you to remove the excess wax. What do I
really have to lose at this point. I rub some on and OH MY GOD!!!!!!!
The scream probably woke the kids, scared the dickens out of my friend,
but I really don't care.

"IT WORKS!! It works!! I get a hearty congratulation from my friend and
she hangs up. I successfully remove the remainder of the wax and then
notice to my grief and despair..................................THE
HAIR IS STILL THERE....................... ALL OF IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So
I shaved it off. Heck, I'm numb at this point. Next week I'm going to
try hair color......</span>
 

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That is hilarious. Someone sent that to me in an email and I forwarded it to my daughter, but told her not to read it in class because she'd laugh out loud.
 

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:eek: OMG!! That's hilarious!!!
 

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Oh my gosh! That was a hoot! I remember the Epilady. Didn't everyone want one for Christmas? I wonder why they aren't still sold.......Hmmmmmm....It was like having a kamillion needles stuck in your leg at one time. Nope, I never did finish that leg....................
 

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I wasn't laughing one bit at all because I thought this was a personal experience that Janet went though... I was thinking, "oh you poor deer", then I read the other posts and see that people had received it in there email, then I realized that it was a joke :new_Eyecrazy:


That was truly a DUH moment for me!!! LOL

Anyways, that is HISTERICAL
 

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Someone got rich off of that Epilady! It had to have been a man who came up with that one! But I, like many others, bought right into it.
I can still feel the pain!
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
Originally posted by scottchelf@Sep 11 2005, 06:12 PM
I wasn't laughing one bit at all because I thought this was a personal experience that Janet went though... I was thinking, "oh you poor deer", then I read the other posts and see that people had received it in there email, then I realized that it was a joke  :new_Eyecrazy: 
 


That was truly a DUH moment for me!!!  LOL

Anyways, that is HISTERICAL
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[/QUOTE]

Omg, you are kidding of course

I have one of those epilady things and they are darn cruel to say the least
but I did go to a salon once to have my wax job done and I was so bruised and sore from the dreadful experience that I still couldn't wear my bathing suit because of the mess I was in :eek: . I will never do that again.

I did get to laugh at the brother inlaw getting the epilady caught in his beard. That would have hurt too.
 

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I had NO IDEA it was a joke--I really thought Scooby Doo did that!!
But I'm sorry I couldn't help it I was lmao.........

Scooby Doo~I'm so glad to read it was a joke for your sake!!!!!!!
 

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Discussion Starter · #12 ·
Originally posted by RubyJeansmom@Sep 11 2005, 07:19 PM
I had NO IDEA it was a joke--I really thought Scooby Doo did that!!
  But I'm sorry I couldn't help it I was lmao.........
 
 

Scooby Doo~I'm so glad to read it was a joke for your sake!!!!!!!
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Gee do you honestly think if I did something like that I would be silly enough to tell everyone?

I would be the laffing stock of SM for the rest fo my life

Hubby had that sent to him in an email today and he sent it to me so I thought I would share it around because it was so funny
 

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Discussion Starter · #13 ·
I did get to laugh at the brother inlaw getting the epilady caught in his beard. That would have hurt too.

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The best part (well, not best cause I didn't get to see it in person) was that he did it to show my sister she was a sissy. He didn't believe her when she said it really hurt. So he thought he'd just pull (rip
) out some beard hairs to prove her wrong.
Anyway, it got so stuck they had to CUT it out!!!
...works for me! :D
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Just as well he didn't put it in the no man's land area or he could have had an even more painful experience
or under his arm
owwwwwww it brings tears to my eyes thinking about it :eek:
Men are just so smug and that would have been so embarrassing for him, but so funny from where I am sitting though
 

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I am crying from laughing


I had my legs waxed many times even bikini line (hurts less the more times you are doing it
) but one time I had the bright idea to agree to have my arm pits waxed
I can assure you that was the first and LAST time.
 

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Discussion Starter · #16 ·
Originally posted by MalteseJane@Sep 11 2005, 08:40 PM
I am crying from laughing 
 


I had my legs waxed many times even bikini line (hurts less the more times you are doing it 
) but one time I had the bright idea to agree to have my arm pits waxed 
I can assure you that was the first and LAST time.
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Owwwwwwwww you are a braver lady than I am :eek:
I remember once I was sitting in a waiting room at the salon and a mother took her young teenie in to have her armpits done because she wanted it done and she screamed in pain from the first one and wouldn't let them do the other one.
 

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Originally posted by Scoobydoo+Sep 11 2005, 04:29 PM-->
<!--QuoteBegin-RubyJeansmom
@Sep 11 2005, 07:19 PM
I had NO IDEA it was a joke--I really thought Scooby Doo did that!!
  But I'm sorry I couldn't help it I was lmao.........
 
 

Scooby Doo~I'm so glad to read it was a joke for your sake!!!!!!!
<div align="right">index.php?act=findpost&pid=98559

Gee do you honestly think if I did something like that I would be silly enough to tell everyone?

I would be the laffing stock of SM for the rest fo my life

Hubby had that sent to him in an email today and he sent it to me so I thought I would share it around because it was so funny

<div align="right">index.php?act=findpost&pid=98565
[/B][/QUOTE]

I KNOW
!! I was EVEN thinking "why on earth is she telling us this"
.... oh well what can I say--maybe I got a little to much rest today.
 

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Discussion Starter · #20 ·
Originally posted by RubyJeansmom+Sep 11 2005, 11:18 PM-->
Originally posted by [email protected] 11 2005, 04:29 PM
<!--QuoteBegin-RubyJeansmom
@Sep 11 2005, 07:19 PM
I had NO IDEA it was a joke--I really thought Scooby Doo did that!!
  But I'm sorry I couldn't help it I was lmao.........
 
 

Scooby Doo~I'm so glad to read it was a joke for your sake!!!!!!!
<div align="right">index.php?act=findpost&pid=98559



Gee do you honestly think if I did something like that I would be silly enough to tell everyone?

I would be the laffing stock of SM for the rest fo my life

Hubby had that sent to him in an email today and he sent it to me so I thought I would share it around because it was so funny

<div align="right">index.php?act=findpost&pid=98565

[/QUOTE]

I KNOW
!! I was EVEN thinking "why on earth is she telling us this"
.... oh well what can I say--maybe I got a little to much rest today.

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[/B][/QUOTE]

You know as I first read that story I thought just how easy it would be to actually get into such a pickle and wondered if in fact it could have happened to someone, but had it been me I would never admit it to anyone I knew because I would be reliving it every day from the teasing I would get from hubby.
 
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