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Discussion Starter #1
Yall! I'm pissed beyond belief! Just in case you forgot, Noriko's on Prednisone for her shaker's syndrome. Of course, she's going to gain some weight because they're steroids. My BF has told me she's gained alot more weight over the past few days and wasn't sure why. Anyway, I have fall break and came home today instead of friday and HELLO! She HAS totally gained weight since the last time I saw her which was SUNDAY(3 days)! She is ridiculously fat for a Maltese! I went upstairs and I saw her food dish filled to the rim with dog food! WT*&^*#&@&!! It's my bf's mom that's doing this. She swears she knows more about dogs than we do and she's never owned one. I am at my breaking point. I'm tired of her telling me how to take care of my dogs. SO STUPID! Once I was trying to tell Cloud to hush and quit barking and then she was like "let him bark...bla bla bla" HOW STUPID IS THAT!?!?! And then afew wks later she tells me he barks too much! Does she have short memory lost or something? I want to CHEW HER OUT AND PIT HER OUT AND CHEW HER OUT AGAIN! She drives me up the wall. Noriko is so fat that her heart beat seems so much faster and she cant go up and down the stairs anymore because of her big freakin' belly! I am so stressed! I've just went thru a test in every subject last wk and last wk my car hydroplaned and I just got back home from taking a midterm exam. I want to tell her "THEY'RE NOT YOUR DOG! LEAVE THEM ALONE!" She thinks that fat dogs are "CUTE"! ARE YOU KIDDING ME!?!?! FAT doesnt mean HEALTHY! I swear she does not think. I'm so pissed, ya'll dont even understand...
 

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OMG! Poor Noriko!

Could you maybe take her back to school with you? If you could it might be better for her since your bf's mom is over feeding her.
 

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Omg!!!!

I would be totally pissed off if that happened to Rosie, I even get realy mad when somebody gives her more than 2 cheerios
How horrible
 

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i sorta know how you feel. my mom likes to play 'rough' with the dogs and basically hits them. i yell at her everytime. (its happened like 4 times already). and she'll slip and call them her children
instead of grandchildren.

if noriko is seriously that overweight....i would yell at her. there's no reasoning to how she thinks---so you cant talk calmly.


i honestly think....you should take buttercloud and noriko back with you to your apartment. at least they'll be safe.
 

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OMG she is not fit to care for you furbabies if she won't listen to how you want them cared for. If she can't do exactly as you want her to then sadly you need to find someone else to mind them if that is possible.
 

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Tell her the number one trigger for canine diabetes ( other than a few breeds prone) is being OVERWEIGHT!!! Add the pred and it is just a "trigger waiting to 'go-off".
I doubt she'd want to have to give 2 injections of insulin a day.. and you can tell her that is EXACTLY what would HAVE to be done!! NO! not diet controlled.. NO! not pills! NO! not even just 1 shot per day.. BUT has to be two!
Also a condition called diabetic cataracts can occur if the diabetes does kick in.. and often they go blind overnight..yes! overnight!! I am not exaggerating!
Print this reply off and show it to her.. trust me!! this is nothing to be faint-hearted about.. it can lead to a very serious health problem ( heart/kidney/liver are also at risk with diabetes.. especially if not detected real early)
Trust me I know what I'm talking about!... my little Missy .... was diabetic.. yes we allowed her to get overweight.. we indulged her.. and yes we were 'killing her with kindness!"... I had to inject Missy's insulin twice a day and it needs to be on a 12 hour schedule! they have to really go on a special diet.. no indulging treats or their blood glucose will go sky high! and endanger their eyes and organs.
better to stick to a diet now than to deal with diabetes down the road!
Yiou have to know the little pancreas was made to produce a certain amount of insulin.. when the body gets bigger then the norm for the fram.. that pancreas has to work overtime!.. sometime it simply 'gives up.. it can't 'keep-up"
I can't stress enough how important this is!!
I am a moderator at a pet diabetes site... I see it all the time!!!
Tell her this is not just a matter of "looks"... this is a matter of warding off a life-threatening health problem!

Terry Angel Missy and little Naddie
 

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So, with all that said, why don't you tell us how you really feel?
Only kidding, and you are probably not in a kidding mood right about now. I know it is hard when you are depending on someone else and then they disappoint you. Maybe you should try to have a calm conversation with the bf's mom and explain your concern about Noriko's weight. Explain that with her other medical conditions that the extra weight can only complicate matters. You might even say to her that you understand that she thinks plump is cute, but with these medical conditions looming, Noriko's well being has to be taken into consideration. Also, bring up the fact that being obese will take a grave toll on Noriko. If she seems to understand try to come up with a solution, a plan to get the excess weight off of Noriko and keep it off. Maybe she should just be putting her food down once a day. There are solutions, but first you will have to take a deep breath and approach this in an adult manner. If this does not work then you may have to find other arrangements for Noriko. Try not to blast your bf too hard. He cannot control what mom is doing unless he is there when it takes place. Maybe he should also be monotoring what Noriko is eating. Have you spoken with the vet about Noriko's diet since she is taking the prednisone? The medication will actually make her hungry and then retain fluids. The weight gain may only be fluid gain. She probably needs lots of liquids. Please do not take your frustration out on Noriko, she only knows that she loves you and she does not want to disappoint you. It is not her fault that she is fat. I hope this helps.
 

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Discussion Starter #8
I thought all this time I have been talking "reasonably" with her. You cant reason with a person like that! I mean what fool doesnt know that OVERWEIGHT=UNHEALTHY? If you don't know that, how can you reason? My bf said he'll probably start locking our bedroom door when he leaves for work. I personally don't want to take care of 2 dogs by myself because they're eating and pottying schedule is different and it's not easy tending to 2 dogs by yourself while going to school and doing hw at the same time. And also, I really can't do that to my BF...Noriko is his lil girl. Noriko coming with me will be the very very very last resort.
I just don't get her. Her thinking is sooo demented. Let me tell you guys some things that I had to put up with:
1. My bf, his mom and I were in the car discussing dogs. This was before our babies came home. I was telling my bf I would like a big dog. They are useful in keeping us protected. And at the time I was very adamant about a big dog. And she was saying "NO get a small dog they're cuter bla bla bla" So later on, my BF got me Cloud. And when we got him, she was like "eww dogs are dirty, I dont want a dog in the house."
I gave her that look and said "you said it yourself you wanted a small dog." She said, "oh, I was just talking."


2. Told her dont give them anymore food. She said ok. Do you know how many times I've come home with tortilla chips on the floor?

3. She asked me "can I feed them grapes?" I said no! It's poison to them! I think the seed can kill them. She says "these don't have seeds," and threw them on the floor for them to eat. ARGHHHHHH

4. I went through alot getting them trained from pads to outside! I did so well that I could leave them home for 6-8 hrs and they would NOT potty in the house at all. Ya'll don't know how happy I was because I went thru alot training them so that I don't have to crate them up. All of a sudden, she started letting them out of the room to roam around the house and put pads ALL OVER THE HOUSE! And NOW...they can't hold it in that long anymore. And I can't leave them home w/o pads or else they'll potty all over the place!

5. We keep telling her to not let them out of the room. Don't let them roam around the whole house. They stay upstairs and I'm scared they'll fall down the stairs or hurt themself with so much freedom. She says that leaving them locked up in my room is CRUEL....My bedroom is 12x24.
Yeah, I'm sure they feel like they're in PRISON compared to their roomy crate!

SOMEBODY SHOOT ME! This list can go on forever.
 

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Discussion Starter #9
Originally posted by IamMomtoMissy@Oct 5 2005, 04:18 PM
Tell her the number one trigger for canine diabetes ( other than a few breeds prone)  is being OVERWEIGHT!!! Add the pred and it is just a "trigger waiting to 'go-off".
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If anyone should know that, it should be her!!!! SHE IS DIABETIC! I just can't say anything anymore without blowing my top. I think I'm still stress from what I've been through and I am talking like a MAD woman because of it. I'm only crazy temporarily.

Sassy's mom-that made me feel a lil better. But one thing...We DO NOT ask for her help. I pretty much want her to leave them alone if she can't follow our rules. We do not need help from anyone not capable of taking care of our babies. But she just doesnt want to leave them alone. She'd let them roam around the house and not watch them. She doesnt even touch them w/o having a towel around them. She should be the 8th wonder of the world because she makes me wonder "what the heck is she thinking!"
 

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I hear what you are saying and I know it is difficult. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. When you and your bf get on your own then his mom can't control anything. (hopefully he won't let her do that) Anyway, try to keep peace between the two of you. I am guessing that she will someday be your mother-in-law, so you want to at least have some kind of relationship with her. It is always difficult when you have more than one family living together....by this I mean your bf's mother and whomever else is in the house, and then you and your bf (as a family). Try to keep your cool if possible.
 

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Sorry, I don't have any advice. Wish I could help.
Big hugs!!!!!!
 

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I have no advice. It sounds like you are in a no-win situation. Too bad you are under so much stress. Take care of YOU!
 

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Discussion Starter #14
Originally posted by Scrappy@Oct 5 2005, 07:39 PM
Oh dear, all I can send is a virtual 
  You are in a no win situation here.  unless of course your bf can move out into his own place then that will solve Noriko's problem.  Goodluck we MIL's can be difficult. 

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This is his own place. I really hopes he means it when he says he'll lock the door while he's at work.
<----right back at ya!
 

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The problem is that you are dependent on her to care for your pups. Unless you can find a way to look after them in school, there is really no way around it. It doesn't sound like you can reason with her.

I used to take my furkids over to my bf's place but his mom hates dogs and bitches at me non-stop. Well, I don't go there anymore and my bf now has to live with me. My house - my rules. As long as I am not living in her house, she can't control how I raise my kids.
 

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I couldn't possibly live with my in-laws. My MIL is a total witch!! Thankfully my husband agrees with me and he hasn't lived at home since 18 (and neither have I) because we went away to college at age of 18 and haven't been back (we are now 27). I feel for you but really your boyfriend should step up and tell her how important it is not to overfeed Noriko. You know steroids lead to weight gain very quickly and it would almost be hard to prevent it even if she wasn't being overfed.

I could never, ever trust my in-laws to watch Miko. They have 2 dogs who are being treated like crap. A lhaso apso who basically is tied outside all day long or stays in garage at night because he is not potty trained (and his pees are too big) and an unneutered yorkie who is aggressive and also not potty trained (at 5 yrs of age) who stays in the kitchen and doesn't even have a doggy bed. Obviously they think I am spoiling Miko!!
 

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Discussion Starter #17
Originally posted by CharmyPoo@Oct 5 2005, 09:40 PM
The problem is that you are dependent on her to care for your pups.  <div align="right">index.php?act=findpost&pid=106859
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No, we dont. We tell her to leave them alone. She doesn't want to. She feels like *WE* don't know how to take care of them and then she messes things up for us. When Cloud first started looking a lil bigger, we told her to quit feeding them (esp. b/c I worry about Cloud's knees) and even told her to PROMISE! She promised and still fed them. I told her he's got knee problems and if she feeds him too much the surgery is $3000-5000. She ignored me...maybe language barrier or doesn't want to listen? I dont know. Do you guys not know anyone like that? It's like I'm describing an unreal person or some tv actress.

By the time I say "I Do" to him, we will be living on our own or else it's a "I won't." But he feels the same way as me. Our house is a lil over 10 yrs old and it's a great house and a great neighborhood, and she is such a pack rat. In her bedroom she has 2 tv's and down stairs in the den she has 3 tv's. Don't ask cuz I don't know. She's got at least 3 lil dvd players. She is forever burning dvd videos and she has stacks and stacks and stacks of them. I think about every 6 mos she buys a new camcorder. I don't know if she returns them and it annoys me that we have to teach her how to use it EVERYTIME she buys a new one! She would always ask my bf to do stuff for her and sometimes she would ask him to do stuff for her friends who he never met!


I am soooooo venting.
 

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I would go with the lock on the door
They will be fine if you just keep them away from her and the only way to do that is remove her access to them...ie. lock them in the room. That way your bf can get a feeding schedule set and he can follow it without her interfering. She is not going to listen..ever..I have a mother just like like and I am telling you from decades of personal experience there is no reasoning with her, it will be her way and her way only if you don't take steps to stop her. You will also be a lot less stressed out if you know all is well back at your bf and your babies with be healthy. Trust me she is not going to listen. Good luck and I hope things get better
 

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So sorry about your situation, its so hard to get other people to understand how we feel about our Malts, or how much research we've done. It seems like in my hometown, either people think I'm a quack for babying them so much, or they want to spoil them too, but they go about it all wrong (I've had the too much food issue with my relatives also, my grandfather once gave Bella a whole unshelled pecan and I had to wrestle it away from her). Its a tough thing to know whats right and to have to take on everyone else who thinks they know best. Hugs and best wishes!
 
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