Maltese Dogs Forum : Spoiled Maltese Forums banner

1 - 20 of 32 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
7,428 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
I think I told you guys that I started to lose weight because my brother was getting married in June. Well right before christmas he came home early and found his fiancee sitting in front of the fire with a guy who had stopped by to get a recipe (yeah right!). Since then they have been having a lot of problems. They started going to a counseller about a month ago. Well Monday's counselling didn't go to well and my brother finally had enough and decided to cancel the wedding. At the time it sounded like they were going to try to still work things out. Something happened on Tuesday that caused him to ask for the ring back. Not sure what exactly. I used to really like the fiancee but lately she has turned in to a word that rhymes with witch.

My brother is the one that has been paying the morgage on their new house and most of the wedding expenses. She has been helping out by paying half the utilities. She told him since she wasn't living their any more that she shouldn't have to pay them. My brother said fine thats fair but since the house is half yours you need to pay half the morgage. She was shocked that he would make her do that. She also was shocked when he told her that she had to pay him for half of the wedding expenses.

Sorry about the rambling, I'm really pissed off at the fiancee!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,035 Posts
Gosh, I'm so sorry your brother had to go through all that. It's better to have found out about this side of his fiancee before the wedding. I can't believe she's not willing to pay her part. Some people are just like that though.
Relationships are tricky sometimes. I'm sorry.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
7,741 Posts
wow! what a mess. well at least u win out of this situation. loosing all that weight is great. Hopefully this doesn't slow u down. how horrible it must be to be in ur brother's shoes. she doesn't sound like the type one would want to work things out. he was smart to call it off. i hope he can find someone much better for him.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,615 Posts
I am sorry that your brother has to go through all this. Please tell him to consult a lawyer as soon as possible. There are so many issues of ownership. First, is the mortgage debt in both names, or just his? And beyond that, is the title of ownership in both names? Or just one? These are all things that need to be clarified before any settlement of the property can be decided. I don't mean to scare you, but your brother needs to clarify these issues before he stikes any kind of "deal" with this woman. And most importantly, he needs for it all to be done officially, not just verbally.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
7,428 Posts
Discussion Starter #5
She wants out but doesn't seem to want to be the one to call it off. So she kept coming up with excuses on why she wasn't sure about them. She even gave my brother a list of things she didn't like about him. THings like not putting his dishes in the dishwasher. My brother tried to work on all of the things and she then came up with more things. She had to move out last month because the catholic school she works for found out she was living with her fiancee (moral clause in her contract). She hardly ever called him or did anything with him. He would sit around waiting for her to call.

My family has tried to not say anything bad about her just in case they worked things out but come on! She is being a total #itch! She obviously doesn't want to work things out. Why is she doing this to my brother? Just end it and let him move on. She can't seem to make up her mind.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,483 Posts
I'm glad he called it off! It seemed so wrong! I wonder what happened on Tuesday!?!?!?!?!!? SO CURIOUS!

Why is he making her pay half the morgage? Why doesnt he just tell her to sign it over to him?

What wedding stuff did they pay for? He must be sooo pissed at her that he doesnt feel much love for her anymore to be strong enough to make her pay her way. Or maybe just smart.

I just hope that this will be a clean split. Tell your brother we're rooting for him!
HAHAH He might think you're
if you do though
.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,004 Posts
Sorry to hear about your brother.
I'm glad that he is making her pay for her share. I don't know why she should be socked, she lucky he is being nice to her and not sticking her with all the bills.
After all, he put his heart and sole out there. Some people just don't know what they have until they loose it. At least your brother has his head on straight and is not letting her take advantage of him. He will find someone who will appriciate him.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
7,486 Posts
I'm sorry that your brother is going through this. You are very smart not to say anything negative about the girl. You just never know what will happen. They might decide that they just can't live without each other.

At least you got serious and started losing weight, so you look and feel better. Just sorry things aren't so good for your brother.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
7,428 Posts
Discussion Starter #9
They are going to sell the house. It is way too big a house for just him. Plus it would be really tough to make all of the payments on his own.

As for the wedding...They have ordered the wedding gown (my mom paid for it as a gift to the fiancee, my brother told the fiancee she had to pay my mom back), church deposit, reception hall deposit, bought flowers to make the flowers themselves, and a bunch of other stuff I don't remember.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
707 Posts
You know...it's so hard to find a good man and this girl finds a good man that has been taking care of her and she just treats him like crap. She doesn't deserve your brother and at least he knows this now before they got married and he would have been more hurt.

I would kick my brother's fiancee a$$ if this would happen to him. They are getting married in March of next year.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,483 Posts
Originally posted by mylittlebella@Feb 24 2005, 11:29 AM
You know...it's so hard to find a good man and this girl finds a good man that has been taking care of her and she just treats him like crap.  She doesn't deserve your brother and at least he knows this now before they got married and he would have been more hurt.

I would kick my brother's fiancee a$$ if this would happen to him.  They are getting married in March of next year.
<div align="right">index.php?act=findpost&pid=37457
[/QUOTE]

No kidding. I'm pretty overprotective w/my older brother. He seems to give his gf's lots of XOXO's and I'd hate to find out that he was being played!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
707 Posts
Originally posted by ButterCloudandNoriko+Feb 24 2005, 01:31 PM-->
<!--QuoteBegin-mylittlebella
@Feb 24 2005, 11:29 AM
You know...it's so hard to find a good man and this girl finds a good man that has been taking care of her and she just treats him like crap.  She doesn't deserve your brother and at least he knows this now before they got married and he would have been more hurt.

I would kick my brother's fiancee a$$ if this would happen to him.  They are getting married in March of next year.
<div align="right">index.php?act=findpost&pid=37457
No kidding. I'm pretty overprotective w/my older brother. He seems to give his gf's lots of XOXO's and I'd hate to find out that he was being played!
<div align="right">index.php?act=findpost&pid=37461
[/B][/QUOTE]


Me too but my brother is younger and I'm SUPER SUPER overprotective.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
894 Posts
It's sad and hard to sit back and watch someone you love hurting. Sometimes it's really best to be there for them and let them vent. You are right in "holding your tongue", very wise move. Please do suggest to him that he goes directly to a lawyer or Para Legal to set straight the house issue. This is VERY serious stuff. If he can prove that he alone has made all the mortgage payments she may have NO RIGHT to 1/2 of the house. It depends on so many things and on the laws of your particular state. I am still so proud of you that you lost all that weight, do NOT let their issues undermine what you have accomplished so far!!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,035 Posts
Originally posted by Lexi's Mom@Feb 24 2005, 11:57 AM
She wants out but doesn't seem to want to be the one to call it off.  So she kept coming up with excuses on why she wasn't sure about them.  She even gave my brother a list of things she didn't like about him.  THings like not putting his dishes in the dishwasher.  My brother tried to work on all of the things and she then came up with more things.  She had to move out last month because the catholic school she works for found out she was living with her fiancee (moral clause in her contract).  She hardly ever called him or did anything with him.  He would sit around waiting for her to call. 

My family has tried to not say anything bad about her just in case they worked things out but come on!  She is being a total #itch!  She obviously doesn't want to work things out.  Why is she doing this to my brother?  Just end it and let him move on.  She can't seem to make up her mind.
<div align="right">index.php?act=findpost&pid=37442
[/QUOTE]
She made a list of things that she didn't like?!?!?! Man, it really sounds like your brother is better off without her! It doesn't matter if she didn't make up her mind yet, just as long as your brother has. He can move on and find someone who will love and appreciate him for who he is. I hope all of the financial things get worked out quickly.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
7,428 Posts
Discussion Starter #15
My mom told me last night that he is thinking of selling the house and buying a smaller one. He then wants to try and "win her back". I was like "WHAT?!?!?!". We both think he is nuts to do it. We are hoping in a couple of weeks that he will realize it.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
7,840 Posts
So sorry about all the mess...but glad that your brother is standing up for himself..
. Always better to find out now rather than later!

My sister called off her first wedding 10 DAYS BEFORE!!!! I WAS SO PISSED! Mitchell and Emily were both very young then. My sister was very selfish at that time in her life. She planned the wedding at a VERY bad time for both my husband and I and we had to jump through hoops to make the plans work to be there. THEN she went and cancelled it!!!!
We went ahead and went down there at the scheduled time because we had already made all the arrangements. Come to find out, she had a honey on the side that she had met at work...
....had been seeing him for quite some time! She even spent her originally planned wedding night WITH THE OTHER GUY! :eek: I truly WAS NOT VERY HAPPY WITH HER! The day of her wedding (that didn't happen) we went out to lunch-the whole fam damily!!! SHe sat there and cried about how pretty the day was and blah-blah blah!!! Then she went out with the "other" guy that night.


Anyway, that "other" guy is now her husband and the father of my beautiful neice and nephew!
So now, when I think about how angry I was with her, I have to laugh...because things TRULY worked out for the best! I am glad, regardless of the money and all that was lost by calling it off so close, that she made the decision that was right for HER at the time!

SO, my moral to the rambling story is...keep your chin up, you never know the good that can come out of this...and at least is was more than 10 days before...he he..
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
6,614 Posts
oh man.. if anything at least you lost the weight (almost all of it) that you wanted to lose. Maybe you'll get married instead!

Your bro is better off... shes playin games.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,483 Posts
TLUNN---HAHAHA SHUTUP!
Sounds like the moral of the story is KEEP LOOKING cause you might find something better!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,005 Posts
I am sorry about your brother. It's good he found out who she really is now though. If they do get back together then I hope for her sake it was wedding jitters and she won't ever do that again. I try to see the good in people, even though she really doesn't deserve it!
I agree with your brother getting a lawyer. I hope he wrote his own personal checks to pay for the house (closing costs, down payment, inspection, mortgate payments, taxes and so on), so that she doesn't get a penny when he sells it. And I hope that works in his state.

Originally posted by Lexi's Mom@Feb 24 2005, 11:57 AM
She wants out but doesn't seem to want to be the one to call it off.  So she kept coming up with excuses on why she wasn't sure about them.  She even gave my brother a list of things she didn't like about him.  THings like not putting his dishes in the dishwasher.  My brother tried to work on all of the things and she then came up with more things.  She had to move out last month because the catholic school she works for found out she was living with her fiancee (moral clause in her contract).  She hardly ever called him or did anything with him.  He would sit around waiting for her to call. 

My family has tried to not say anything bad about her just in case they worked things out but come on!  She is being a total #itch!  She obviously doesn't want to work things out.  Why is she doing this to my brother?  Just end it and let him move on.  She can't seem to make up her mind.
<div align="right">index.php?act=findpost&pid=37442
[/QUOTE]

Man that's really bad that she made a list, but I have got to hand it to your brother, he's a great guy. Any guy that would actually take the list seriously without getting mad and actually try to fix it! Man she lost a good guy!
Keep up the good work with your diet! You might not have his wedding to lose the weight for now but you have yourself and your health to lose it for now.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,483 Posts
Originally posted by FannyMay@Feb 24 2005, 12:23 PM
Man that's really bad that she made a list, but I have got to hand it to your brother, he's a great guy.  Any guy that would actually take the list seriously without getting mad and actually try to fix it!  Man she lost a good guy! 
Keep up the good work with your diet!  You might not have his wedding to lose the weight for now but you have yourself and your health to lose it for now.
<div align="right">index.php?act=findpost&pid=37490
[/QUOTE]

DITTO! HAHA, If some dude made a list of my flaws I'd be laughing in his face and telling him to walk on! Not trying to say he's gullable at all...just that he's a better significant other than me!
Your bro seems to be a good guy for making the effort! Maybe his friends should give him a bachelor's party anyway! To celebrate being single!!!!!
 
1 - 20 of 32 Posts
Top