But, of course, it comes with a lot of work LOL Life is never easy!
I will steal from a wonderful trainer who explained the Excito-meter to me. Basically, when the dog is relaxed, the Excito-meter reads low. As they are stimulated, it rises and rises until it is in the red, the point of no return where the dog is too excited to behave (the time when they tiddle). However, you can learn to control the dog's Excito-meter.
Start by teaching your dog how to "watch me". Basically, they just have to make eye contact with you. It gets there attention. To do this, say watch me and bring a treat up to your eyes so the dog looks up. When they look, click and give them the treat. Repeat, repeat, repeat.
Now after you get their attention, start doing simple obedience like sit and down with their attention. Keep everything calm and focused. Do this as a quiet time of the day.
Now that you have the tools to get the dog's attention and focus it, get them a little excited and calm them down. Once you are super-successful at that low level on the Excito-meter, get them up another notch and bring them down. Keep going until you have to use you coming home or somebody coming to pet the dog as the stimulus. At this point, you can set them up where the friend only pets them if they are in a down or a sit stay.
Getting the Excito-meter reading to drop will help to decrease those pesky tiddling incidence. If you can keep them out of these situations as much as possible while you are training, that would be good.
If your dog is having problems with submissive urination, I would go about it a different way.
and how do u go about it for submissive urination...both the dogs my mother has had have done this. the yorkie is so bad she pees the second a stranger walks through the door. everyone knows to go straight to the back yard. they tried ignoring her, but nothing has worked. my mom is now scared to get another dog b/c she doesnt want another to develop this behavior.
LM, submissive urination requires confidence building, especially with strangers. It is a bit harder to give advice without watching the dog and when it reacts. Your mom might benefit from seeing a local trainer or behaviorist so that they can better assess the dog's reactions. Basically, we give them the skills to be confident in social situations and act like a mature dog. I did this with my Jonathan. He's still a bit of a fruit cake, but so much improved. We did a lot of obedience, strangers tossing him treats, setting him up to great people on his own terms, etc.
I forgot to add that Jonathan also flipped out when somebody came in the house. We desensitized him with the help of a safe place (his crate). We did that with the help of a behaviorist to form a plan of action. She's actually the trainer who took me under her wing. She was extremely inventive with dogs, making the program fit the individual.