[triste]

God bless all who loved her.

 

[pico's parent]

May she rest in peace for eternity in God's heavenly abode.

 

[Sisses Momma]

I pray her family can find peace now that Terri has passed. I pray they can somehow all come together

 

[sheila2182]

May all who loved her find peace that she is now in a FAR Better Place.

 

[msmagnolia]

I doubt they'll be able to come together, but I sincerely hope that the autopsy lays to rest the questions. At this point I hope that the report is that she was severely brain damaged, as her husband believes. Maybe then her parents will be more accepting of the outcome and all parties can get some peace.

 

[a2z]

Her mother need grief counseling to help her let go.

 

[Brinkley & Neyland's Mom]

Originally posted by msmagnolia@Mar 31 2005, 11:36 AM
I doubt they'll be able to come together, but I sincerely hope that the autopsy lays to rest the questions.  At this point I hope that the report is that she was severely brain damaged, as her husband believes.  Maybe then her parents will be more accepting of the outcome and all parties can get some peace.
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[/QUOTE]


I agree wholeheartedly. My prayers are with the entire family as well as the doctors and lawyers that were involved.

 

[k/c mom]

This makes me very sad. I think I was one of the few people who did not want her to be denied nourishment and water. I wanted her parents to take charge of her care and her future.

This whole story is just so very heart wrenching......

 

[Holliberry]

Originally posted by Kallie/Catcher's Mom@Mar 31 2005, 01:42 PM
This makes me very sad. I think I was one of the few people who did not want her to be denied nourishment and water. I wanted her parents to take charge of her care and her future.

This whole story is just so very heart wrenching......
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[/QUOTE]

I'm with you. I dont think its just a few of us.

My thoughts and prayers are with her parents today.

 

[msmagnolia]

I have very mixed feelings on this subject, as well. I don't understand why Dr. Kervorkian went to jail for helping people plan their own suicides; yet they would literally cause Terry Shiavo's death by denying her food and water. I think that this is a big example of how our government sends mixed messages to people. I agree that she wasn't going to get better, but I really felt for her parents and could see giving care over to them. I sadly suspect that money was a lot more the issue than either side wanted to let on. Now that it is over with, though, I hope that they don't find something in the autopsy which would make everyone feel even worse.

 

[saltymalty]

This was a no win situation. I don't think the family will ever be able to resolve what has happened to their child. I hope that everyone can move on.

For me, I have three children and I have to think of them first. If I am deemed brain dead, pull the plug and the life support. I would only be an emotional drain and financial burden to them. I would much prefer that they remember me as healthy and that I leave behind some means to take care of them. My husband feels the same way. His statement was "life insurance doesn't get paid unless a death certificate is issued." We might both think differently if we weren't parents, but we both feel it's necessary to put our children's needs before our own in this case.

I don't know what I would do if this happened to one of my children. Hopefully, that is a decision that we will never have to make.

 

[k/c mom]

Originally posted by msmagnolia@Mar 31 2005, 02:35 PM
I don't understand why Dr. Kervorkian went to jail for helping people plan their own suicides; yet they would literally cause Terry Shiavo's death by denying her food and water.  I think that this is a big example of how our government sends mixed messages to people. 
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[/QUOTE]

What a great point..... !

 

[Harleysmom]

I just hope that the 2 families came come to agreement about her funeral plans.......enough of this torment!

 

[triste]

Originally posted by Kallie/Catcher's Mom+Mar 31 2005, 01:50 PM-->

<!--QuoteBegin-msmagnolia

@Mar 31 2005, 02:35 PM
I don't understand why Dr. Kervorkian went to jail for helping people plan their own suicides; yet they would literally cause Terry Shiavo's death by denying her food and water.  I think that this is a big example of how our government sends mixed messages to people. 
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What a great point..... !
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ok something I also agree on(the Kevorkian thing). I don't want to be attached to artificial life support either but I find it hard to say that food and water is life support. Is food a medical treatment? I'm not trying to start a debate, just thinking out loud.

 

[Ladysmom]

ok something I also agree on(the Kevorkian thing). I don't want to be attached to artificial life support either but I find it hard to say that food and water is life support. Is food a medical treatment? I'm not trying to start a debate, just thinking out loud.

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There was a similar case in Missouri back in the late '80's involving a young woman who was involved in a car accident that left her in a permanent vegetative state. (Cruzan v. Director, Missouri Dep't of Health) Like Terri, her only life support was a feeding tube. In this case it was her parents who fought to have her tube removed. She also didn't have a living will, but had told several people that she would never want to live in a half-human state. It went all the way to the Supreme Court. The Supreme Court decided that a feeding tube was artificial life support and the parents were allowed to have the feeding tube removed and let her die.

Some of our law is written, some is decided when courts hear and decide cases. So this decision became the rule on feeding tubes being regarded as artificial life support and courts are obligated to follow it in situations where it is clear that a person would not want to be kept alive by artificial means. All the courts found that those were Terri's wishes.

It is so sad that this became a battle between her husband and parents when it was really all about Terri - her medical condition and what she would have wanted. It wasn't the parents or the husband's decision to decide to pull the tube or not - it was up to the courts. It didn't matter if the husband had "moved on" or the parents were willing to care for Terri. All the courts repeatedly found that she was brain dead with no hope of recovery and that she would not have wanted to live that way.

 

[Sunshine]

I haven't really heard the whole story, and I am mixed about how I feel about what I know...

I don't think cutting out food and water was the right way - although, I do understand that she had no feelings - she couldn't tell that she was hungry or thirsty, she didn't know... but letting someone literally "waste away" I think is a bit cruel. I'm sure there were other ways to approach it.

I also read that the family was very angry at the husband. First up, I can see why because they are her family - nobody wants to see this happen to their child... but in his defence... he sat beside her every day for 6 years. SIX YEARS. By then he knew that he would never have his wife back. It's only natural that he move on eventually - and I think that 6 years of "nothing" warrants great respect - not "she's your wife and you should be there with her, not off with another woman". Would she have wanted him to spend his life just sitting there? I don't think she would. I don't think anyone would expect that from their loved one. He's not a bad person for moving on. We all do after tragedies - it's the only way. He spent six years just waiting for her. How much more of his life did they expect him to continue doing this? Your partner's ending does not mean yours, and I would never expect it to be for my husband...

I think maybe in these sorts of circumstances, the family wants so badly for one thing, that they start to see other things differently - they start to grasp.... maybe this is one of those times?

But as I said, I don't know the whole story. Not trying to tread on toes, would just like to know if anyone else has similar thoughts or has heard the same things I have.....

Sometimes we get warped media! LOL

 

[Brinkley & Neyland's Mom]

Originally posted by msmagnolia@Mar 31 2005, 02:35 PM
I have very mixed feelings on this subject, as well.  I don't understand why Dr. Kervorkian went to jail for helping people plan their own suicides; yet they would literally cause Terry Shiavo's death by denying her food and water.  I think that this is a big example of how our government sends mixed messages to people.  <div align="right">index.php?act=findpost&pid=47870

[/QUOTE]

This is a good point...still contemplating if it really parallels with Kevorkian...my wheels are turning...

It seems the same-yet different to me, and I am trying to work it out in my wee mind.

Originally posted by saltymalty@Mar 31 2005, 02:37 PM
This was a no win situation.  I don't think the family will ever be able to resolve what has happened to their child.  I hope that everyone can move on. 

For me, I have three children and I have to think of them first.  If I am deemed brain dead, pull the plug and the life support.  I would only be an emotional drain and financial burden to them.  I would much prefer that they remember me as healthy and that I leave behind some means to take care of them.  My husband feels the same way.  His statement was "life insurance doesn't get paid unless a death certificate is issued."  We might both think differently if we weren't parents, but we both feel it's necessary to put our children's needs before our own in this case. 

I don't know what I would do if this happened to one of my children.  Hopefully, that is a decision that we will never have to make.
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I agree with you on this...

My husband and I have talked, and I am going to draw up a living will. IF something of this nature were to happen to me...I SURE don't want to lay around for FIFTEEN years like that! I just have to determine my time frame. I had a friend this past year who for almost two weeks was only holding onto this world by a respirator and LOTS of prayers. She miraculously pulled through-and now she is as healthy as ever and we have to pinch ourselves sometimes to remind ourselves the situation she/we were in just a few months ago! If she had a living will that said no life support at all in any circumstance, she would not be with us now.

That fact FREAKS me out. So I want a reasonable time frame before someone pulls my plugs...but it is NOT fifteen years! I can't imagine that husband/kids/parents of Terry waking/sleeping every day for 15 years with her in that condition in the backs of their minds. Even if the parents can't admit it right now, there is a part of them that has to feel some relief.

 

[puppylucy]

ohh wow. rest in peace

i heard about that on the plane; we were watching the news on those little satellite tvs and it was all breaking news

i feel terrible for her family.. but i for one am glad (? sounds like the wrong word) that she is gone.. i believe that a life like that is just NOT worth living. i mean, 15 years in a coma.. even if suddenly by some miracle she sprang out of bed how could she psychologically cope with that? i mean, that has GOT to be crazy weird.. so much has happened since her accident. just a new perspective on the issue.

i have nothing but sympathy for her family and everyone who was close to her

although they knew it was coming, it still probably came as a shock.. such an awful finality.

nevertheless, i believe she is in a better place now, and probably thrilled to finally be out of the coma that gripped her for 15 years....

 

[Toby's Mom]

 

[puppylucy]

aww i hope she didn't feel pain

but i agree. why is it "legal" to administer a lethal injection to a criminal but it's "murder" to do it to a person who is a vegetable? and what makes yanking the feeding tube up "legal"? it's kind of mind boggling.. like.. it just makes no sense.

i feel that if it's legal to slowly starve and dehydrate a comatose person, it should be equally as legal to administer an injection that will cause a lot less pain for both the recipient and the people involved.